Tired

Is it the month thats tiring me? I feel like drifting, floating. Not belonging anywhere. People fill places where i should be but i am not able to state a claim. If they not want me to be there, why should i force it? I need to be needed, otherwise there is no sense in even trying. I am exhausted, burned out, i'm falling in no specific direction. These days come an go, sure. But they come more often and they stay longer everytime. The space in between, when i am able to produce something, when i feel connected (well.. feeling loved is out of the list, since that is something i barely remember) are so hard to reach that when i do, i don't find the power to care for it.